2023_make making_그리기,인화지

내 키만큼 큰 무거운 인화지 롤을 붙잡고 필요한 길이 만큼 풀어낸다.

종이 뭉치의 무게를 몸으로 받치며 칼로 종이를 자르고, 머리에서 발끝까지 세로로 가르는데,

몸과 칼이 함께 흔들려 선은 쉽게 일직선을 벗어난다.
그렇게 잘려 나온 비정형의 종이 조각위에 그림을 그린다.
빈 인화지는 빈 캔버스와는 다른 방식으로 ‘비어’ 있다.
표면에 물감을 묻힌 붓을 대면 곧바로 흔적을 붙잡아 문신처럼 새겨지고,

농도를 희석하면 이번엔 종이가 그것을 뱉어 내며  밀어낸다.
전자의 경우엔 과격한 붓질로 밀고 나가야 하고,

후자의 경우엔 살얼음판을 걷듯 조심스럽게 티 나지 않는 붓질을 여러 번 반복하는 수밖에 없다.
그럼에도 이런 까다로운 밀당을 계속하는 이유는 붓과 인화지 표면이 맞부딪힐 때 생기는 마찰 감 때문이다.
캔버스 천은 내 움직임보다 더 미끄러져 마음에 들지 않고,

유화물감은 오일 특유의 성분이 화면에 불필요한 환상을 덧씌우는 것 같다.
반면 인화지 위의 아크릴은 융통성 없고 엄격하며, 나의 움직임을 고스란히 받아낸다.
그림이 완성되면 이제 낱장을 ‘세우는’ 일이 남는다.
가끔 등장하는 오브제 설치들은 바로 이 낱장의 그림을 어떻게 세울 것인가에 대한 고민에서 비롯된다.
내 화면 속 대상들은 대개 버티고 견뎌야 하는 존재들이다.
그래서 얇은 인화지 낱장도 벽에 스스로 버티듯,

그러나 날카로운 긴장을 잃지 않은 상태로 걸리는 것  까지가 작업의 마지막 단계다.

 

I unroll only the length I need from the heavy roll of photographic paper, nearly my height. 

Bearing the weight of the paper against my body, I run a blade down its length, from head to toe.

The cut edges easily deviate from being straight as my body sways.

I paint on the irregular piece of paper cut in this way.

A blank sheet of photographic paper is ‘empty’ in a different way than a blank canvas.

When the inked brush touches the surface, the paper immediately absorbs and inscribes the ink upon itself like a tattoo.

But when the paint is diluted, the paper rejects it, pushing it back out.

In the former case, I must press forward with forceful brushstrokes,

and in the latter, I have to move as cautiously as if walking on thin ice,

carefully repeating strokes that barely touch the surface.

The reason I continue this demanding push and pull lies in the sensation of friction that arises

when the brush meets the surface of the photographic paper.

I dislike how cotton canvas glides beyond my movements, and how oil paint,

with its inherent material qualities, casts an unnecessary veil of illusion over the surface.

In contrast, acrylic on photographic paper is inflexible and exacting,

taking in my gestures exactly as they are, without compromise.

Once a painting is finished, what remains is the task of making each sheet ‘stand’ on its own.

The installations that occasionally appear in my practice arise from the question

of how to make these individual sheets stand.

The subjects within my paintings are, for the most part, beings that endure and withstand.

For this reason, allowing a thin, single sheet of photographic paper to hang on the wall as if standing on its own,

while retaining a sharp sense of tension, constitutes the final stage of the work.